(The title of this post comes from a band I used to listen to in Junior High when I was pseudo-angry and really cutting edge but still deeply nerdy. They’re actually worth a listen if you can stand academic rap. )
In the past I have called for fellow Atheists to come out of the closet. Richard Dawkins is leading the charge to encourage non-believers to stop hiding behind the term “agnostic” and tell the people they work with, live with and love that they are Atheists. I believe strongly in this principle and know that it is the surest way to gain acceptance and end the ignorance that so often accompanies the “A word”.
And yet (this is where the hypocrisy comes in) I haven’t done the same in my own life. Now don’t get me wrong, everyone who knows me knows I’m an Atheist. My family, all my friends and anyone who ever happens to bring up the subject of religion within a 10 mile radius of me, all know how I feel. (Although I have learned to be a little less psycho militant about it as I’ve gotten older. It doesn’t exactly endear you to people.) On this blog however, I have remained anonymous and it has been nagging at me for ages.
There were several reasons why I chose not to use my name and simply go with Atheist Mom. It provides me with a sense of freedom to write about whatever and whomever I choose without the fear of repercussion. Mostly, I was concerned that my in-laws might be offended by what I have to say about their cult religion. My husband also has a completely irrational fear that I would be endangering our kids by posting their pictures online next to the word “Atheist”. Irrational but not crazy. So, we’ve reached a compromise – I will post our pictures but not our last name. Is that still wimping out? It’s a tough one – I want to introduce you to my family and my life but I also want to protect them and my husband is a pretty private guy. I’m trying to remain true to my ideals without pissing off the man I love.
So, there I am – up in the right-hand corner. Atheist Mom…also known as Caroline.
And here are my adorable babes:
Congrats on the new addition to your household! Your children are beautiful!
I really liked this post of yours. I identify with the Agnostic vs. Atheist as we describe ourselves and our beliefs (or lack thereof). I sometimes have a hard time saying I’m “Atheist” because I’m not 100% confident that there isn’t a God. I don’t think there is, I don’t pray to one, I am not spiritual, and I am not teaching my children to worship some heavenly being. I struggle saying it because I just don’t know for a fact. I don’t think anyone knows whether there is or isn’t a God (although I highly doubt there is one). I feel Atheist, I don’t believe there is a God. I do feel like I’m a bit of a wuss when it comes to saying that I am, I worry like you do, about family. Although, I think if I told my family I was Atheist, then they would probably be more respectful of my family and be more conscious of their actions.
I usually tell people I’m Atheist to shut them up. If I said “Agnostic”, then most people think that there is still hope for my soul. Once you say “Atheist” it is like shutting a door to any type of conversion attempts.
Anyway, I need to be more certain of what I really think and believe, until then I will be an Agnostic to some, and an Atheist to others. All in good time, right?
I think it’s great that you’re being more open about your identity and applaud you further for NOT posting your last name.
“Atheist” issue aside, there are weirdos out there and you should always err on the side of caution, no matter what your worldviews are.
Oh, and you have a lovely family!
Congratulations on your new baby! And thank you for this post. I have begun, over the last two years, to come out of the closet myself. What has been most interesting to me is the number of religious people who, when I enter into a conversation with them about “God” and religion, assume that because I am an atheist, that I must not have enough knowledge about God/Religion in order to form a personal relationship with God – as if I’m some lost soul, just wandering this earth with no purpose! I especially enjoy the conversations where I end up having more knowledge about someone’s religion than they do! ;O)
Lovely family, congrats on the newborn ! I have a hard time “coming out of the closet” with some of my friends, because we just avoid the subject. They are mormons (living in Utah, hard for them not to be), and they just assume I am not, and don’t ask what I am. I just avoid the subject because once you say you are atheist, you need to explain your position, and they feel attacked in their beliefs. I just know that they will never change, and telling them something that they are not ready to hear will just hurt our friendship. I know I am taking the easy road, but I just don’t care enough. If they bring up the subject, Ill tell them. They haven’t invited us to church yet, so we’ll see…